Deranged Love
by VirulentVampyre
Summary: A re-imagining of the "Mad Love" story, set in the universe of Joker (2019). 12 years after the Gotham Riots, Dr. Harleen Quinzel lands a residency position at the once known Arkham State Hospital (now Arkham Asylum). She takes a particular interest in the high-profile inmate, Arthur Fleck, leading her down a frightening path.
1. Hook

**Author's Note: Hello readers, I'm testing the waters with this first chapter and I need to make sure it reads well before I continue. My main concern is whether it bothers any of you or not that I write the characters' dialogue in their accents. I want to be as accurate as I can on how I present them, but if trying to write out a Staten Island or Jersey accent is too distracting or annoying, please let me know in the reviews. I don't want to make it difficult to read. Thank you a****nd enjoy! 3**

* * *

_Journal entry, January 3rd, 1993_

_I despise Staten Island. And I despise this agreement I begrudgingly made with my mother. Coming home for the Holidays is less than joyful when your family unit is fractured and in a persistent state of bickering…_

I frowned at my pen, letting it pause in its tracks. The slivers of sunlight creeping in through the train's window reflected off my eyeglasses. It pulled my attention away and I was met with a whirl of colors flashing by. Every now and again I could make out a building, each one more rundown than the last. We were close to Gotham at this point and I could feel the corners of my lips pulling up into a content smile.

_Gotham…_

My pen continued to write before I could even look back down.

_Dirty, poor, crime-ridden and I couldn't be happier to go back. It's home. And fortunately for me, I've got an opportunity waiting…._

I chuckled quietly to myself. It was a guilty chuckle, knowing that the average citizen of Gotham was struggling in their day to day life. I was too. Until I got the phone call that realized all of my hopes and dreams. Let me tell you about charisma, Kids. It gets you places. In my case, it got me a residency at Arkham State Hospital, later renamed Arkham Asylum.

My stomach twisted in both excitement and disbelief. I landed a residency at the home of Gotham's most notorious and criminally insane. This was big and the thrill of it had me over the moon. I spent all week babbling on about it, seemingly to myself as my mother and the rest of my family wanted nothing of it. They think I'm disturbed for pursuing a career in psychiatry. Ha. Jokes on them. My whole dysfunctional home-life is the reason why I was driven toward Psychiatry in the first place. My fascination for murderers and sociopaths developed at a later time. Thank you freshman year of college.

"Now arriving at Gotham City Station." The overhead voice jolted me from the daze I slipped into. I scrambled to pack away my journal and gather my belongings, eager to start this next chapter of my life.

* * *

"Hawleeeeeen!" A thick Jersey accent squealed, prompting me to look behind in the station's crowd. I spotted the source of the voice and instantly gave Jenny a large, toothy grin.

Jenny was a very robust-built woman, someone who looked as if she could pull her own weight and knock your teeth in with a single swing. She was a stunner though, with perfectly pink, plump lips and naturally rosy cheeks to match. Her curly brown locks bounced off her shoulders as she came barreling over to me. I caught a glimpse of her dramatic cat-eye liner scrunching upward with the rest of her face as she smiled. She locked me into a hug, my breath hissing between my lips from the sudden impact. I chuckled and wrapped my free arm around her. After a moment of silent reunion, she released me.

"Okay.." Jenny put her hands out in front of her, excitement flushing her face. "I know I already told ya congratahlations, but that was over ta phone. SO CONGRATAHLATIONS!" She exclaimed loudly, jumping in place and garnering the attention of random passersby.

I couldn't help, but giggle at her antics. My own personal cheerleader since day one of freshman year. "Thank ya, Jen. I have a really good feelin' about this."

"So...how tah folks react?" Her smile faded with my eye-roll.

"As per-usual. But who cares. It's mah life and I'll do what I want with it." I shrugged.

Jenny grinned in response, giving me an encouraging pat on the back. "That's ta spirit!" Her attention shifted to the bag over my shoulder and the second in my hand. "Here. Let me help ya wit tose." She relieved me of the bag that I was holding and guided me forward.

"I really appreciate ya bein here, Jen. But ya didn't need ta come all this way just ta ride in tha Taxi with meh."

"Course I did." She smiled warmly, nudging me playfully in the arm. "I'm not gonna leave mah best friend ta celehbrate bah herself."

We reached the stairwell leading to the Station's exit. As soon I took my first step I was greeted with a breeze that carried Gotham's sour stench and bustling noises. A deterrent to most, but not to me. For the first time in a long time, I was happy to be here. _Happy_. Not a word I was often familiar with. Not truly. Ever since I was a small child and my father checked out, it hadn't been an easy ride. Things were finally looking up though. I had faith they were.

* * *

A winter shower made its appearance later that evening, offering a soothing backtrack of pitter-pattering against the window pane. Jen and I sat curled up on the couch, giggling away over a glass of wine and pizza. I reached for the bottle to top off.

"I bet it's gonna feel so good ta quit the cafe." Jen mused as she watched me fill my glass to the brim. She lifted her own and wiggled the stem, signaling for more. I happily obliged.

"Oh it will. I'm gonna finish out the week to make rent and then it's au revoir." I said smugly as I topped her off.

"Nawt even a full two weeks notice, huh?" Jenny raised her brows, impressed. "Can't say I blame ya though. Nev'ah hated a job more than that in all mah life."

"Hell, nah." I snorted before knocking back half my glass. I cringed as the acidity burned the back of my throat. "I couldn't get outta there fast enough. And besides, Tony's a real sleaze. I don't feel obligated ta give him or his business any kind'a respect."

Jenny nodded in agreement, her eyes reflecting a twinge of envy. "Fair. Just wish I could do tha same."

A frown threatened at the edges of my mouth. I reached out to place a comforting hand on my friend's shoulder, my thumb stroking soothingly over her sleeve. "Ya day will come, Jen. You'll see. The economy is gonna get betteh, places will start hirin' again, we're on the verge of a new Mayah…"

Jenny let a smile slip through as she gently shook her head. "Ya know what I love bout ya, Harls? Yah always so optimistic bout every'thin. I swear, someone could drahp dead and you'd find a way to brighten tha mood."

I shrugged and a rather large grin creeped onto my face. "Well I do know how to put the 'fun' in funeral…" I laughed when Jenny smacked me on the arm.

The familiar sound of the 20/20 theme song trickled out of the television set and I sat up in attention. "Shhhhh! It's on!" I silenced Jenny just before she could say anything, my hand waving frantically in the air. We both twisted our bodies to face the T.V., eyes wide in anticipation. The host stared back at us, her expression stern as she made her introduction. Tonight's episode would cover a series of crimes and the infamous individuals behind them. The first story was one that came straight from home.

"_It was over a decade ago since Murray Franklin's murder and the Gotham Riots broke out. Tragically, these events led to further grief with the deaths of Thomas and Martha Wayne. So what exactly happened that fateful night to prompt these horrific events? On tonight's 20/20, we investigate the man behind it all. Arthur Fleck, a once resident of east-side Gotham and occupational party clown... "_

I pulled my legs up to my chest and hugged them tightly. My breathing hitched as I leaned forward, canceling out the rest of the world.

"_Notoriously known by citizens and rioters as… Joker." _The T.V. continued.

_Joker. _I let the name linger in my head. I thought back to when I was just 14 years of age and watching the Murray Franklin Show on prime time. I watched him get shot on live television. I specifically remember the blood splatter, my mom screaming in the background, and the quick switch of the screen to black. Fast forward to my first year of college, I took a criminology course and we studied the Gotham riots. The second I heard Arthur Fleck's name, I was hooked. He ticked, but why? Was it truly society's doing, or was it his mental illness? I needed to know what made him the Joker…What made a man shoot another man in cold blood... And it was that curiosity that made me go down to the counselor's office and switch my major's concentration to criminal psychology.

"He was sentenced to Arkham State Hospital, where his bloodthirsty acts continued by taking the life of his own therapist…"

I inappropriately smiled.


	2. Line

The week couldn't go by quick enough. It was painstakingly long day after another, grinding for any cent I could pocket. I still hadn't told my boss that I was quitting, as to try and avoid immediate termination. So here I was, juggling the late-night drunks that would always try to cop a feel, or the needy stay-at-home wives that would flood in for their brunch time gossip and mimosas. And to think it was only Friday...no, Saturday? I didn't know anymore after having worked a straight double. The joys of a 24 hour establishment.

At some point I must have shifted in and out of consciousness because I didn't remember what I was doing seconds prior. Everything just kind of went black until Jenny's shrill "Hawleen!" stirred me from my fog. I blinked at my reflection in the large, glass pane window. Something hot and wet splashed my ankle and it wasn't until I looked down that I noticed coffee spilling from the pot in my hand.

"Shit!" I yelped, quickly lifting the pot up and brandishing a rag from my apron pocket. I bent down to wipe up the spill. Unbeknownst to me, Jenny was frantically ringing the kitchen bell.

"Ya got table six waitin'." She urged.

I nearly stumbled trying to get back up to my feet. Jenny pursed her lips as I rushed past her to retrieve the food waiting at the kitchen window.

"Betteh not let Tony see ya like this. He's been on evehyone's ass this mohnin'". She huffed, her eyes kept low as she counted the cash at the register.

I ignored her, not wanting to linger on the fact that I still had a couple more days of hell awaiting me. Gathering the tray, I glided it through the winding obstacle of counters and table tops, only to be met with a group of disgruntled middle-aged women. After a minute of them lecturing my service, I sucked in a frustrated inhale and came to terms that they were a lost tip. Better luck next table. I turned on my heel and darted back toward the kitchen, just about past the 'employee's only' labeled door before I heard a "Hey, toots!" hollering after me. I immediately clenched down on my teeth, reluctant to face Tony.

"Hey! Look at me when I'm talkin ta ya!" He barked, grabbing me by the arm to spin me around. I tore myself away from him and backed into the counter. "Wanna tell me why ya left a table unattended while ya were busy staring off inta lala land?" His breath reeked as sour as the rest of him. I leaned away, my glare piercing back at his own.

"Sorreh, Boss." I growled through gritted teeth. "Won't happen again."

"Ya damn right it won't. I'm still docking ya check foh this one. Now get back ta work and stop fuckin around." He pointed aggressively forward, his meaty arm too close for comfort.

I felt my cheeks grow red and hot with rage as I held back every retort that clawed desperately to escape my lips. Inhaling hard, I turned away from him. I didn't make it so much as a millimeter before I felt the wind nearly knocked out of me and the stinging sensation to follow. His grip lingered on my ass for a second too long before releasing me with a tumble forward. Silence filled the air as anyone within visible range witnessed what had just happened. I met Jenny's mortified eyes and could tell it took every ounce of patience in her to hold her tongue. I silently reassured her before taking a slow turn in Tony's direction. He was immediately taken aback by whatever expression had settled onto my face. My eyes narrowed in on him, my throat dry.

"Ya deaf or what?" He challenged, leaning in to assert dominance. "Get. Back. To. Work…." He hissed each syllable between his teeth like some menacing reptile.

My soul must have slipped from my body at this point. I lost all control. Without a second of thought my fingers intertwined around the handle of a knife that had been set neatly on a counter place set. I saw red. I couldn't tell if it was from my own rage, or from the vast amount of blood splatter that met my face as the knife wedged itself under Tony's Adam's Apple. I could hear screams and bodies scattering from all around me, but saw nothing. Nothing other than the gurgling, bloated mass of a man before me. It must have taken three more thrusts before he slumped against the wall and to the ground. I admired his now silent corpse with a giggle of both disbelief and satisfaction at what I had done.

My eyes fluttered and to my dismay the image before me was gone. The sting of the smack was still there and I bit down on my lip to contain newly budding rage. I walked away from Tony, not wanting to arrive at Arkham as an inmate. Jenny watched me sympathetically from the cash register, her cheeks just as red as mine. I could tell she was having her own fantasies.

"Jesus Fuck…" She muttered once I reached her side.

"Scuse me." I replied, nudging her lightly to access the register.

"Uh…, Whatcha doin there, Harls?" Jenny questioned me with a single raised brow. I only smiled and slipped my hand down her apron to steal a cigarette and light.

"Quittin'!" I chirped, lighting my cigarette with one hand and retrieving a wad of cash with the other. "No one fuckin' touches me." I dropped the lighter back in her pocket and flipped through the bills. "One hundred foh rent…and anotha foh workplace harassment." My hand slapped the money down on the counter as I inhaled a long but satisfying drag of my cigarette.

"Are ya nuts?!" Jenny gasped. "He won't hesitate ta call tha cops-" I immediately cut her off with an abrupt chuckle.

"Well good luck tryna prove it was me. That dumb-bastard is too cheap ta install a single security camera." I tucked the money comfortably in my bra before untying the gaudy blue apron around my waist. "Behsides, he funds his alcoholism from every Friday night's earnings. Doubt he'll notice." With an elegant sway of my hand I let the apron fall to the ground. "See ya at home, babe." I flashed Jenny a playful wink and spun around on the balls of my feet, darting for the sweet freedom that the exit promised me.

"Where ta fuck is she goin'?!", was the last thing I heard, to which I threw both of my middle fingers up in the air behind me.

* * *

I've never welcomed change as much as I did today. As I sat at my vanity, I stared back at the girl in the mirror. A mixture of fear and excitement of the unknown swirled around in her blue hues. She was alert and ready to engage. The girl before me had purpose, she had a mission and she believed that things were really starting to look up for her. She smiled.

My fingers tenderly weaved loose strands of blonde hair up into a bun. I grabbed a final pin to seal the deal, tucked in the end of my shirt and lined my lips in a stunning matte red. The final result was a professional. I was no longer a rambunctious little girl with big dreams that seemed too far out of reach. Success was near and from this day on, I was _Doctor _Harleen Quinzel.

When it came time to leave, I hurriedly packed my purse. I was so frantic in the moment, nearly rushing out the door when I realized I had forgotten it. I stopped short, spotting the little yellow folder resting at my bedside table. I retrieved the folder, taking a short moment to peek at its contents again as a sort of good-luck send off. A newspaper clipping with Arthur Fleck's grinning mugshot stared back at me. I felt my stomach twist. Except this time I couldn't be sure that the feeling was attributed to nerves.


End file.
